Boobs, Bras and a Big Night Out?

I feel quite fortunate that, after several years out in the wilderness of the interweb, I seem to finally be finding the cool people. Last week I told you about going shopping with Jen and Chloe, two girls who I met in a chat room I often frequent for people of my disposition. Theres been a few others who I've chatted to and have decided that, considering there is no chance of moving out of my parents box room just yet, that I will take the bull my the horns and fabricate a night out for myself.

So come the second Friday of next month, a week or so after I turn 24 for the second (or is it third?) time I shall be going down south for a "friends birthday" (for "friends birthday" please read "tranny night out") and meeting up with allot of cool people, getting dressed up pretty, and hopefully not embarrassing myself too badly. (my friend Lucy has promised not too let me drink too much wine).

I am *very* excited and really can't wait. Not just so that I can dress how i like in public, but so that I can get to know better some people who I've had good chats with on the net. I've got my outfit picked out now. The theme is 'red' which was the clincher really on my outfit (my wardrobe is so limited there isn't that much red in it really) so I'm going to wear my corset with my lil tartan skirt and some fishnets thrown in. I bought some shoes in mancs last week so hopefully those will do. They're a little too big but i hear you can fix that problem by inserting some gel pads or something.

Speaking of insertions (no not that kind) I've been test driving my new boobs this week too. I still feel D cup is potentially too big for me (and certainly too big for my bras) but it goes ok when i wear a t-shirt or other high necked top. I might take them for fun but I don't think they'll work with my corset.

I also bought another couple of essentials for the Big Night Out, a new set of panties and bra as my previous set looked like I'd stolen them from a tiny Japanese manga girl (i actually did buy them in Osaka so maybe that's not really surprising). They're very sexy and I might put up a pic for you readers if I can find one that isn't too raunchy. And also I bought a shrug, I've got no pics of that as yet, but it goes really well with my corset and means by boi shoulders draw slightly less attention.

Anyway, I'll put some pics up with this blog of the outfit, as well as some of the recent pics. Hope you like!

Piper
xxxx

Shopping Spree!

I spent so much time moaning about how my difficult personal situation makes it tricky to get out en-femme that's it's started to annoy even myself. It seems to be a major skill in the trans spectrum to find excuses as to why we can't do the things we want and so it's hardly surprising that this has led to a reputation of time wasting fantasists in the eyes of others. The Internet is proliferated by people who claim it's their heats desire to explore femininity or bdsm but get cold feet at the first opportunity. I am determined not to be one of those people.

It was partly for this reason that I was very excited to meet up with two girls from chix the other day for some shopping in mancs. For me it was an easy (although not without natural reservations) first step. I'd talked to both girls online for a while and felt like I knew them before hand, we met during the day in a public place and lastly we were all in boi mode. Being trans dressing is important but not as important as other people knowing who you are. I write this really because I want to encourage people who feel they are trans to try and do something about it. I felt for the longest time that my trans tendencies were some kind of secret perversion like looking at porn and masturbating that should not be shared with others. I wish it hadn't taken me till about the age of 23 to find that this wasn't so.

When I came out to my brother it seemed like that was the point where I felt I could be tg, he was the first person I came out to who really knew me. Sure, you may have lots of online friends who know the girl you, but until you meet in the flesh they only know one side of you. So in an effort to explore my femininity i went, dressed as a boy, to meet two other guys in a town an hour or so away.

Jenni and Chloe were wonderful genuine people, but then I knew that before I met them. There's a lot of nutters on the net but you can take your time to find people who you would be friends with even if you didn't share trans-tendencies. This was defiantly how I felt hanging out with them. We wondered around various clothes shops and I even managed to buy a few things I needed (some heels as the ones i use currently are kinda 'borrowed' and some girl trousers.) and basically just hung out.

I felt I got alot from the day just from *being* with other people. Maybe I've just been sitting around on my arse all day for too long. It reminded me a little of how things had been in Japan when I'd come out to all my closest friends there. I think for many people we *are* somehow ashamed of being trans and so put up a wall between us and others. How can you truly be close to someone with a barricade between part of you and them?

So this entry is in part a thank you for Jenni and Chloe for a great day out, proof that I'm not a lazy fantasist who isn't prepared to even take the tiniest of steps towards self exploration, and an encouragement to anyone who happens to read this. You have nothing to be ashamed of. People might react in different ways when you tell them you're trans, and I urge you to use caution and await the right time, but there are people out there who get you, people who you would be friends with regardless of you desires to dress or whatever, find these people and find yourself.

The Rest of the Story

Ok, so I felt a bit of a tease the other day by starting to tell you all about my visit to see Rachel. But I did feel that the blog was getting a bit long and I like to keep these posts short and pithy so as not to bore you all to death. So where did I get up to...

I'd managed to navigate myself past the hazardous school kids, slipped on my wig and found my way to Rachel's door. To be honest I hadn't given too much thought to this moment over the last 24 hours. I think part of the reason I suggested meeting up with such short notice is that I knew if we planned to meet the next week or later that we both might have second thoughts or something else might have come up. This way I had no chance to back out as I knocked on the door.

I'd spoken to Rachel on the phone and seen her on web cam before we met and both helped to make me feel reassured. When she opened the door I knew I'd made the right choice to meet. Rachel was older then me but she had a very sexy and classy look and defiantly knew how to put an outfit together. She invited me in, and being a good English host, offered me a cup of tea.

We sat in her front room and chatted for a while. I was still in my andro outfit -boi jean and jacket with a girl tee and bra on under- and so soon switched to my new dress. It was the first chance I'd gotten to wear it properly. I've put a picture up so that you can see. It's a very pretty classy dress i think although a little figure hugging. That's fine of course if you have a nice figure but mine needs a little bit of work.

I did feel a little over dressed and so I changed into something a little more natural, my girl tee with a blue denim skirt. I looked similar to how I looked in this picture. Unfortunately I didn't have room to take my camera in my bag and I felt it would have been a little rude to have asked Rachel to take some pictures of me, so all pics here were taken after the event.

Before we met I had told Rachel a bit about my sub side and she had admitted to having a Domme side. So after chatting for a little while she suggested that maybe we could play for a little bit. My heart nearly skipped a beat as although I have long dreamed of participating in some D/s play I had never had the opportunity to try anything in real life.

Rachel took me through to her back room and instructed me to kneel down facing the corner. This I did while she disappeared out of the room. The sensation of kneeling felt good to me and I enjoyed holding a submissive position with my hands on the back of my head. After a few minutes Rachel returned, but now with her legs clad in a pair of black knee high boots.

Before we began Rachel had asked what kind of fantasies I had and I had confessed having a puppy girl fantasy. It was in this direction that she now guided me. She forbade me from making eye contact and instructed me to speak only when permitted. These restrictions made me feel even more submissive and at her whim. Not being able to look up at someone but to stare at a fixed spot on the floor made me feel very isolated and on the edge.

Miss Rachel, as I began to think of her, instructed me how to kneeling pleasingly with my hands forward like a puppy and had me crawl across the floor. She instructed me to come to heel and punished me if I was not quick enough or pleasing enough. She spanked me as punishment and although I'd never really thought of being spanked as being a turn on I really enjoyed it as i felt i was being disciplined and trained to be more pleasing and obedient.

She also had me kiss and lick her boots...I feel a bit shy about going into detail here but the whole point of this blog is to talk about my exploration of my femininity and submission so it would be unfair not to go into details. At the same time though I don't want to descend into anything too smutty...just yet...

I leaned down to kiss the toes of her boots and found at once that my hair fell down in the way. Miss Rachel told me to lick her boots and so I did, forced as I was to hold my hair back as I busied myself. I thought I might have felt shame or something doing this but I just felt so happy to obey and I wanted to please Miss Rachel. She instructed me to lick higher and clean all of the boot. The leather felt good under my tongue. Miss Rachel told me that she wanted to feel my tongue through the leather and so I licked harder, forcing my tongue against the leather as I licked up and down.

We finished shortly after that and returned to the front room. Miss Rachel told me just to call her Rachel again and we were back to how things had been before. We talked a little while longer and then I had to leave. I was sad to go and wish we had had longer to play. All in all it was only about 20 mins, but when your a subbie you can't really ask to go on longer then the Domme wishes. I for one loved the experience of D/s play and can't wait to do it again in the future. I hope Miss Rachel enjoyed it also and that we can meet up again soon. Even if it's just for another chat I'll be happy. It felt right to be myself and talk naturally without hiding my "dark secret".

The Trans Commandment

A satirical (sa.tir-ik-ul: of, pertaining to, or connected with satire) look at some tranny rules of living. ***disclaimer: no offence intended***

here n findsome home truths about becoming a Transsexual, if you can think of any additions pleae do tell me , it is vital for the well fair of your femenin friends

• Never take medicine from a Doctor, they're secretly part of an illuminate conspiracy to make us obedient vegetables (like carrots and broccoli, but not like tomatoes who, as well all know, are devious little motherfuckers). Instead get meds *only* from supplies you can trust who sell them for $1.99 on the Internet.

• Never go down to the benefit office dressed in a pink leotard and 5" gold sandles. You may think you look "hawt" but you might get some funny looks. There are some benefits you can get from that outfit however, such as free drinks from any number of sleazy gay clubs. Try them all to find the best deal!

• Smoke as much as you can as a girl, its great for you figure and is an essential part of your training if your hoping to partake in the World Wide Lesbian Conspiracy (WoWiLezCo). Spend all you money on 'brainwashing' CD's, you know you have too much money and those clever people who have found inventive ways of relieving you of your cash deserve a nice holiday.
  

• Look after your hair, it's not like us t-girl could get away with wearing wigs.

• Wear sunscreen.

• Shave your forehead to encourage hair to grow there, that way no one will notice the stubble on your upper lip and just think that you have some rare condition like hairyitus.

• Never start a land war in Asia.

• Don't lean on things, you might fall over.

• Don't have so much soya it is high in Urinates, and don't drink water, its high in Poonates. Stick with diet cock, ooops sorry, typo diet *coke*. If it's got 'diet' written on it it must be good for you right?

• Drink only bottled diet cock, the canned stuff has been tampered with by the Catholics/ Free Masons/ Illuminate/ WoWiLezCo and think that people who wear skirts are a threat to their plan for global domination/ summer holidays.

• If you start to get stalked by wierd people who speak liek they know you run off to the Pictern Island and don't come back. Do this especially if those wierd people look like your parents, friends, or relitives as it means that the Illuminate has got to them already! In fact, do that anyway, no one lieks you anyway.
  

• Until you have fully transitioned don't go into the female loos. Don't go in the male loos either tho as they may think your gay and beet you up. Instead do a piddle on the midway point between the two then no one can complain. If you need a number too go to the bar and ask if you can borrow a bucket.

• Beware of Gender Therapists (The Rapists!) they work for the Illuminate et. al. and don't really care about helping you. Order all your meds online and then once the arrive stockpile tins of beans to last you 2 years in a wardrobe then hide in they're chrysalis like until you are fully femme (or at least have a nice pair of boobies)

• Don't socialise too much. Your a freak and nobody likes you.

• Burn your lap top after reading this at once as a secret Illuminate Internet spyware that is on all pc's with cause it to explode in the next three seconds.

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BOOM!
I'm going to the special Hell, the one reserved for child molesters, people who talk at the theatre and people who rip the piss out of paranoid trannies.

(the management would like to thank Jezzka and Jenni for their help with this piece and for Ultra for being the inspiration. They would also like to say that this is a work of fiction and any resemblance to people living or dead, or articles that may look similar, is purely coincidental.)

New Year, New Dress, New Friend

So you know how I've been banging out about "wanting to get out and explore my femininity and submissive side" and all that crap without actually doing anything about it? Yeah, thought you might have picked up on some of that. Well today I actually did something about it.

It's not that I haven't been trying to be proactive, I've met some awesome girls of late online and have been trying to plan some form of meet/night out as well as having talked to some really genuine Dom/mes who I'd love to visit for the weekend. But it always comes back to the same problem, what do I say to my parents without giving them a bare faced lie? If only there was someone in my home town who I could hang out and dress with who maybe had their own interest in exploring their Domme side. If only...

I got talking to Rachel through a mutual friend who when I mentioned where I lived asked me if I knew Rachel. She hooked us up on yahoo and we really hit it off. Rachel was very easy to talk to, she dressed with class, and in addition to that she had a bit of a Domme streak she was wanting to explore. She had a web cam and a genuine attitude and I quickly felt very comfortable talking with her. We got talking saying that we should meet some time maybe. Then I had to say something stupid.

I suggested that we met up the very next day. Great. Finally I find someone local who seems normal and not some scary and random caricature and I go and chase her off by suggesting to meet like some over zealous puppy. But to my great surprise and pleasure she said that would be fine. I guess somewhere I was thinking that if I tried to over anylise the situation there was a chance of planning something in the future and then other things coming up. By doing something so soon it left little time to worry about anything.

We arranged to meet the next day after lunch which meant that I could get out and be back home without having to explain my whereabouts to my parents which was really convenient. We chatted on the phone in the morning and Rachel sounded very nice serving to reassure me further about meeting. However she did ask that I came dressed. I think its easier for people that way as seeing someone in boi mode can really break the girl illusion. I'd been playng with the idea of getting a bit of an andro look and so didn't feel too nervous about popping on a bit of make up, some girlyboi clothes and packing a bag of other clothes including a new dress I'd bought that had arrived the previous day. This is it in the pictures btw? I love how versatile it is. I've only got half the styles figures out but I'm sure they'll be plenty of time. Sorry that theres no pics of me up in it yet I promise to take some for the next blog. But heres another one of me as a bit of a page filler :p

Anyway, I cycled across town and left my bike by the river. I didn't know if there would be anywhere to park outside Rachel's house so for some crazy reason I decided to walk the last 200 metres or so. I was wearing sun glasses so no one would be able to see my eye shadow or mascara but the bra I was wearing might have made me stand out a little bit.....I had no idea it would be so busy! I kept my eyed down and flushed red every time i was forced to walk past anyone. At one point I saw some young guys approaching, about 19 or 20 and had to take a quick detour out of the way as if anyone was going to say anything about a boy walking down the road in a padded bra they would!

Things didn't get much better from there. I followed Rachel's directions but found out that she lived right next to a high school....and it was lunch time! So all the kids were milling around the street! I was petrified someone might say something. Finally i found a quiet back ally, put my wig on, and I was ready to knock on the door. Hmmm....I think the second part can wait for the next post. =D see you soon!

Resolution

First let me say Happy New Year! to all who read this. I now have 5 readers and I'm up to well over 3000 hits now which is very flattering. So thank you for reading this and taking an interest in my boring-ass life.

So 2009, a make or break year for me maybe. If in twelve months time I'm able to be in a position where I am independent, living in a place where I can come and go as I please without the need for a convincing cover story, and have the freedom to dress where and when I please then I am sure the year will be an unqualified sucess. If, however on the other hand, my situation is little different for how it is now, well, lets hope it does not come to that or else the year might feel to have been a waste.

My plan for the coming year then is as follows:

• Get a job, preferable one that is in a different town or at least pays enough that I can
• Get my own place. The chances of actually having a place to myself is perhaps limited, especially if i do move down to London, but providing I'm out of my parents hair I hope to be able to
• Get out more. It's important for me not to be cooped up in a closet at home, and actually as we speak I'm talking to some people about a possible night out in mancs in the coming month. The more I get out the more I can explore my femininity and perhaps meet people from the BDSM scene also so that I may possible
• Get Owned. This is not so important as getting out, but my interest in BDSM is something I would also like to explore so it would be nice to get the chance for that as well.

Thrown in the middle of all that is the standard "loose weight" which also might be easier once I move out as then I'll have more control over what I eat. I've been going for jogs lately and have tried to drink less beer (and more girly drinks, malabu coke is my current favorite) so I hope that I'll get more trim if i keep it up.

Oh yes, and in other news I ordered some clothes online so hopefully they'll come soon. I'll write more about that in my next post, and also about my shopping trip to boots to buy some "essentials" but those mis-adventured can wait a little while i think.